Song basher
by maraudergirl68448
Summary: Clary is an anonymous song basher that changes lyrics to popular songs and uploads them to YouTube. Jace becomes a fan of her song bashes and soon meets the red head, but will he discover her secret hobby? Rated T for language and sexual mentions in parodys used. Disclaimer: I don't own the mortal Instruments or any parodies used!
1. Chapter 1

Jace Herondale was waiting in his car waiting for his best friend, Alec Lightwood. They were going to a club and Alec was running late...as usual.

Checking his appearance in the small mirrors provided in the car, Jace ran his fingers through his golden locks to make them look professionally messy. His golden eyes had their usual twinkle in them.

His eyes were strange, but they seemed to entice girls all the time.

Finally getting impatient, as he would start pulling his perfect hair out, he honked the horn of his car for the fifteenth time. He would go inside and drag Alec if he had to.

finally the sickly pale looking emo with deep blue eyes appeared, running down the steps of the Lightwood house which was huge and also known as the Institute because it used to be an institution for talented children before it went bankrupt and was auctioned off to the Lightwoods who didn't spend that much on it.

They had it remodelled to look like a house now, but it was still known as the institute.

Alec finally reached the car, Jace noticed a grin on his face as he hopped in.

"Any reason you kept me waiting for so long?" Jace asked, seriously annoyed.

"Izzy was showing me this video of a girl bashing songs by changing the lyrics to make fun of the artist. She's hilarious!" Alec said, chuckling.

"What girl?"

"No one know! She's anonymous! She wears masks and wigs so no one can identify her!"

"Well lets see one of these videos and see if it was worth keeping me waiting." Jace said, whipping out his phone and throwing it to Alec.

Alec smirked as he pressed buttons and finally finding a video, he passed it back to Jace.

As the load bar was buffering, Jace could see a person wearing a parrot mask with a blue wig. The only thing that could be seen of the her appearance was green eyes that were visible through the eye holes and her neck which was pale. She was wearing a dress that looked like a white cloak that surrounded her body but it had random splotches of different colours on it.

The music started, the same melody as Lady Gaga's song, applause.

**_Remember when I used to not totally suck?_**  
**_My songs and videos were not pretentious and fucked up_**  
**_But then I lost my damn mind now I am in a bird-cage_**  
**_I've gone completely mad I'm totally bat shit insane_**  
**_I combined art and pop and made a flop_**

**_Don't let your children watch this_**  
**_It will scare the poor things shitless_**  
**_I need attention constantly_**

**_I've covered myself in blood_**  
**_I've worn a meat dress_**  
**_I even convinced the world I had a penis_**  
**_My whole career is built on horrible gimmicks_**  
**_Instead of focusing on making good music_**  
**_All of the stuff I do is for the fame_**  
**_Like making a whole CD exploiting the gays_**

**_I think I'm god's gift to the human race_**  
**_Now watch me smear random shit all over my face_**

**_I try way too hard to be seen as artistic_**  
**_But it just makes me seem like a pathetic narcissist_**  
**_One second I'm a woman suddenly I am a swan_**  
**_You have no freakin' idea how many drugs I am on_**  
**_A lot_**

**_I am the definition of egotistic_**  
**_She's right I just looked it up and it shows her pic_**  
**_I'm so conceited and smug I eat my own shit_**  
**_Then I wash it down with a glass of Gaga piss_**

**_Everyone clap for me_**

The sound of a crowd clapping was heard.

_**Yes that is it!**_  
_**Now you're all under my spell I am a fame witch!Yes it's working.**_

_**I'm transforming into a true fame monster soon I will rule all the earth.**_

Jace was laughing at the video and laughed harder when another figure that had a nineties Madonna costumed figure came on wearing a blonde curly hair do and an anonymous mask appeared, but singing in the same voice as the first.

**_Gaga is just a fraud, hold your applause._**  
**_She is just trying to be the new version of me, clearly._**  
**_I was the first attention whore._**  
**_Now it's time to end this war!_**

**_Look at my magical jugs they'll see you free._**  
**_Stop giving Gaga your love._**  
**_Save it for me._**  
**_The whole world's sick of you. Check this headline._**

**_Your last tweet was retweeted only 4 times._**

**_Sorry Gaga you're through._**

By the end of the song, Jace was wiping tears from his eyes. He looked over to Alec to see him smirking again.

"Fine, it was worth it. You still could have texted me or something so I wouldn't be freezing my ass off." Jace said, tucking his phone into his jeans and starting his car.

"Well I was hoping you would go without me. Sorry for being optimistic." Alec grumbled. He hated going out. He was the complete opposite of Izzy. Speaking of which...

"You know I wouldn't leave without you." He would never admit to how close he was to leaving without him. "How did you get Izzy to not come?"

"She has a date with some guy. I sometimes wonder if the two of you made a competition to date people." Alec shook his head, crossing his arms and staring into the lit up city of New York.

"You make that sound like a bad thing." Jace grinned as he started to pass slow drivers. "How did you find the video anyways?"

"She has loads of them. Iz found them somehow and she got me to watch them. Its one person. No other person shows up in her videos. She uses sound effects and everything." Alec said, stifling a laugh.

"So it's a female with a good voice and good at camera and directing stuff."

"Yup. No one knows who she is. The only thing people know about her is what you said and her green eyes."

Jace nodded. Her eyes were startling. He could still see them when he blinked. He didn't think it was possible for someone to have eyes so green.

"Why is she being anonymous? It's not illegal to make fun of songs."

Jace saw Alec shrug from the corner of his eye. "Maybe she just doesn't want to be ridiculed by people who do like the songs?"

"It seems like a lot of effort to go through just to make fun of songs."

"Says the guy who lies to girls constantly to bring them home."

"Hey! I don't need to lie. I just twist the truth a small bit."

"You once told a drunk girl that you were a brain surgeon for the stars."

"Is it my fault for lying, or the girls fault for believing me?"

"You're not expecting me to answer that, are you?" Alec said, sounding shocked Jace had even asked.

"I think I already know what you would say. _Jace, you are ons smoking hot god! Any girl would be nuts not to fall for your charm!" _Jace grinned as he heard Alec grit his teeth as Jace had impersonated his voice perfectly...maybe a little girly.

"I do not sound like that!"

"Agree to disagree. Oh look we're here!" Jace said quickly as he parked in a parking lot that was across the street from the Pandemonium club.

* * *

**Hello everyone! Thank you for reading this fic, if you have! I don't own the Mortal Instruments or any songs/parodies used! This idea was stuck with me for a while and I just had to write it!**

**I'm not sure if I'm going to continue this story, just thought I would put it out there! If you would like me to continue, tell me and if you would like me to include a parody, leave the name of it in a review or PM me!**

**I mean no harm in this story, I just like listening to parodys as they're really funny! :D**

**The parody in this story was by Bart Baker, it is obviously Lady Gaga's applause! check out his YouTube channel! He's hilarious! He has loads of parodys done!**

**Hope you all enjoyed the story! :)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hello everyone! Sorry for taking forever to update, I was stuck on this chapter and I'm not happy with it, but I did my best!**

**Thank you all for the support I received from the first chapter! I'm glad you all like this idea! :D**

**Also, someone asked if I could do a parody that includes Miley Cyrus song, 23, but I can't find any parodies for that song! I really want to do it, but I can't find any! :(**

**I was going to include a parody in this chapter, but I wasn't sure where to fit it in! I'll be sure to include one in the next chapter! Send me a suggestion and I'll try to find a good parody! :)**

* * *

Well that was great.

Jace and Alec were walking into Taki's, the best diner in New York.

They had left Pandemonium early as a girl Jace had dumped a few weeks ago had been there and had walked up to him every time he talked to a girl saying why they broke up. After an hour of this, Jace had found Alec who was by the bar playing on his phone and said he wanted to leave.

Alec had been enthusiastic and left as quick as he could. They hopped into Jace's car and headed to the diner to get something to eat like they always did after going to a club.

"I don't know what is wrong with her! I apologised for breaking up with her by telling her friends, but seriously why-"

"I'll be back in a minute. I need to go to the bathroom." Alec said as he rushed towards the bathrooms.

"Thanks for that information." Jace muttered as he looked for an empty booth.

He found one that had just been cleaned. He slid into it and rested his head in his hand while strumming his fingers against the table like he did with his piano.

He looked up from his fingers when he heard something tapping. He looked to the next booth to see a red-head tapping on her laptop. Whatever she was typing had all her attention as she was biting her bottom lip and her eyes were staring intently on the screen.

Jace found something enticing about the girl. She was pale with freckles splashed across her nose and cheeks. She had curly red hair to looked like they reached her waist. What Jace found more interesting were her eyes. They were so startling green. They reminded him of the girl in the video. What were the chances of him meeting the girl in the video the same night he heard her parody?

He shook his head as he thought about how ludicrous he was being. The only comparison was the eyes!

But there was something compelling about the girl.

She must have sensed him staring as she looked away from her laptop to meet his gaze. She looked startled to have someone staring at her, although most people would have the same reaction.

Jace waved his hand, hoping she wouldn't think he was being a creep. She blushed and returned her attention to her laptop.

Jace frowned, but shrugged it off. She was just a normal girl who clearly didn't have interest in him...or maybe she wasn't into guys as that was a more plausible.

Jace than looked towards the bathrooms for any sign of Alec. Heaving himself from the booth, Jace walked over to the men's bathroom and opened the door. There was only one closed stall and no one else was in the restroom.

Jace walked over to the closed-door and knocked. "Alec? You in there?"

"Yeah, but I think I'm going to call it a night. I'm going to get a cab home." Alec said as he emerged from the stall. His voice sounded flat from emotion.

Jace was taken back. "Why?"

"Because I didn't want to come out and I really don't want to listen to you complain about a girl you hooked up with." Alec snapped.

"Woah, where did that come from?" Jace asked, he glared at his best friend that was like a brother to him.

Alec laughed without humour. "I'm just sick of listening to you complain about girls who you've destroyed. You lead them on then when you get what you wanted out of them, you destroy them. Then you have the nerve to complain about them? When will you ever change?" Alec shook his head, letting his black hair fall into his blue eyes.

"Well at least I'm not a prude! I bring you out with me so you can meet some girl and actually build some confidence!" Jace exclaimed, annoyed at Alecs behaviour.

Alec sputtered before shouting "I don't want to meet some girl!" He closed his mouth immediately till it was a thin line. His blushing face turned a deathly white.

Jace looked back at the door that led to the café, hoping no one would come to see what the commotion was about. He turned back to Alec, who was scratching his head. "Well you're not going to find the love of your life if you're stuck in your house." Jace hissed.

Alec looked momentarily relieved before he headed towards the door leading to the café. "Well you're not going to find anyone with your tongue stuck down some bimbo's throat." he said before opening the door and leaving.

Jace shook his head as he left the bathroom and mulled over why his best friends words and why he was acting weird.

He was walking back towards the empty booth he had occupied when he saw it was now full of people. Looking around, the only empty spot he saw was the seat across the red-head who was still on her laptop.

Jace smirked as he sauntered over to the red-head.

"Excuse me, can I sit here?" He asked, waiting for her to respond. She didn't seem to notice him. He tapped her shoulder, causing her to jump and look up at him in shock.

She removed ear buds from her ears which Jace could faintly hear music blasting from "C-can I help you?" She stuttered. Her face turning a crimson shade, most likely from embarrassment.

"Mind if I sit there?" He indicated with his head to the empty seat.

"Go ahead." She said, focusing on her laptop once more.

"Thanks." Jace said, slipping into the seat.

He picked up a menu, looking to see what looked good to eat. The whole Alec thing was still nagging at him. He'd go over first thing in the morning to see what that was about. Alec looked like he had his heart-broken.

Was he upset that Jace was trying to get him to hook up with some girl? Or had he been in some secret relationship and not told Jace, then his secret girlfriend found out Alec was at a club?

First thing in the morning, Jace was heading over to the Lightwoods and getting answers. He couldn't stand his best friend to be livid, especially if Jace was the one who caused it.

"Are you okay?" A small voice took Jace out of his thoughts.

He looked up from the menu, right into two deep emerald eyes. "Um...yeah, why?"

She had an amused expression as she said "You're tapping your fingers on the table and practically glaring at that menu. The blonde waitress asked you for your order two minutes ago, but left probably thinking you were still looking at the specials."

"Oh...Just in my own world..." Jace shook his head of the images of Alec and Isabelle.

The girl raised her hands in surrender. "I was just asking! Whatever that menu has done to you, I'm sure it deserves to be glared at." Jace chuckled.

"Yeah, its been cheating on me with other hungry people." The girl let out a small laugh before shaking her head, causing her red curls to flounce around her face.

"It's a classy menu." She said, raising her face to give a genuine smile.

"Very." Jace rubbed the stubble that was forming on his face. He hadn't bothered to shave it earlier. "What's your name?"

"Clarissa Morgenstern. But I prefer to be called Clary." Jace frowned when she said her full name. She said it like it was bitter-tasting. "What about you?"

"Well Clary, I go by many names. Hot stuff, Baron Hotschaft Von Hugenstein and so many more. I'm more commonly known as Jace Herondale." She cocked her head to the side, a confused and amused expression on her face.

"Well Jace, you ever hear of the term 'modesty'?"

"I have indeed, It is a term mainly associated with ugly people, which I am not. Why can't I flaunt what everyone is already thinking?"

"I'm not thinking that." Clary said, recommencing putting her attention on her laptop.

"Oh really? And what is it your thinking?" Jace crossed his arms on the table and leant forward.

Clary smiled again, leaning closer and closer to Jace until she was barely a few inches away from their lips connecting, she whispered "Why is Goldilocks so vain?" She leaned away and started clicking at her laptop again.

"Harsh." Jace said, glaring at her.

She shrugged "You asked..."

"Well can I ask you two more questions?"

She looked up, narrowed her eyes before hesitantly replying. "Depends."

"Fair enough. When you were introducing yourself, you didn't sound happy about your last name. Why is that?"

"My parents are divorced and my dad got full custody of me and my brother. My dad is really strict and high maintenance. He won't allow me or my brother to visit our mom, not like she's tried to get in contact." She muttered before sighing and shrugging. "What's your second question?"

"Want to have dinner with me tomorrow night?"

She laughed before saying the one word that Jace had never received from his invitation. "Nope."


	3. Chapter 3

**I actuallly updated quickly on a story! I'm so shocked! And I hope you all enjoy this update! Thank you all so much for your support! I didn't include a parody in this chapter (I know I promised I would include one) because I coouldn't find anywhere it would work...**

* * *

Jace stared at the red-head, not comprehending her response.

"I don't think I heard you right. Did you say no?" Jace asked, not believing someone had just rejected him. It had to be a mistake!

"You actually heard me correct." she said, smiling like the unique situation was amusing.

Jace shook his head, trying to think of why she declined his offer.

"Boyfriend?" he guessed.

She quietly laughed before saying "No."

"Lesbian?"

She rolled her eyes before answering "No."

"Are you in witness protection?"

She laughed louder this time before saying "Definitely not."

"Do you understand what the word 'yes' means?" Jace asked desperately. There had to be a reason why she said no.

She frowned at him. "Yes I do. Do you know what it means to not be easy? I'm sure all the girls...and menus, fall instantly in love with you, and as hard as it might seem for you to understand...I'm not interested." she shrugged like it wasn't a big deal.

While in Jace's head, he was freaking out. No girl had ever spoken to him like that. Especially girls he didn't know! He refused to show how distraught she made him.

He smirked as he rested his arms on the table and leaned closer to the red-head. "What's the real reason you won't have dinner with me?"

He expected her to blush, instead her eyes had a hard edge to them and her mouth formed a thin line. "I already told you why." she said, her voice stern.

"You barely even know me. You seem quick to judge me without even giving me a chance."

She was now smirking, as she turned her attention to her laptop, she quickly typed in something then when whatever she was looking for showed up she turned the screen around to face him.

It was his Facebook page and someone had uploaded a photo album labeled 'Jace+any hot Babe=Manwhore' and from the photos showing, all Jace could see was a part of his face as the rest was obscured by girls he was making out with.

The pictures had been taken last week at a party he had been invited to. Had this red-head been searching him while they were talking?

He lifted his gaze from the screen to look straight into Clary's face which looked like a mix of amusement and victory.

"So that's a definite no?"

Jace groaned as he rolled out of his bed. He had just had the worst night ever.

He gets cock blocked by a girl who was determined to get revenge on Jace and then he got rejected and outsmarted by another girl. What next? Was there going to be some hate page created about him like in that episode of two and a half men?

After the red-head got a call, she had left quickly and Jace decided not to look like some stalker so he didn't chase after her. He was most likely never going to see her again.

For some reason, Alecs words and Clarys refusal really got to him.

The memory of Alec storming away reminded Jace that he needed to sort things out with his best friend. Looking at the clock he saw that he had slept in late. It was just a few minutes past twelve in the afternoon. Alec should definitely be awake.

Jace pulled on some fresh clothes so he could head over to the Lightwoods. He was trying to determine how to ask Alec what his problem was without getting him angrier...

"Jace! Are you up yet?" Celine Herondales voice shouted, most likely from her office.

Celine worked as party planner. She organised high paying events and was the most sought out planner in New York. She was serious about her work and if one thing went wrong, she would instantly fix it.

"Yeah! I'm heading over to the Lightwoods!" He shouted back.

He left his room and headed through the hallway to get to the staircase. He passed his father on the way.

"Good night last night?" Steven Herondale asked.

If Steven was Jace's age, there was no doubt they would be inseparable friends, They were just like each other...aside from one of them being happily married.

"Don't even get me started." Jace grumbled.

His father picked up on the meaning and gave him a sympathetic smile. "Want to talk about it?" He asked.

Jace smiled. "Maybe later. I have to go talk to Alec." Jace tried to make his way down the staircase.

"Did something happen between you two?"

Yeah, Alec was being a prick. "No, he wasn't feeling good last night and I just want to make sure he's okay." He said instead.

His father narrowed his eyes in suspicion. He was able to tell when Jace was lying. He finally nodded. "We'll talk later. I have to go into work in an hour, but I should be home before three if you still want to talk."

Steven was a detective for the NYPD. He loved his job and it was through his work that he met Jace's mother. Steven loved his job, but he always placed family first.

"Sure thing dad." Jace said as he climbed down the last of the stairs and left the house to his car parked in the drive way.

He jumped into the driver seat, and started the engine. As he drove to the Lightwoods, he continued to think about how to approach Alec. He still didn't know what caused Alec to get so...angry.

He finally arrived in front of the institue. Deciding to just wing it, Jace walked up the path to the door. He knocked three times, using the creepy gargoyle door knocker. It always freaked him out.

The door opened in less than two minutes of him knocking which was strange. It usually took forever for any anyone to answer the door.

Alec stood at the door. When he saw Jace, he frowned.

"What's up?" Alec asked, acidly.

"Care to explain what happened last night?" Jace snapped, letting anger he didn't know he had seep into his words.

Alec was about to answer, but instead he looked behind himself before quickly replying "Sure, let's go to get a pretzel." he tried to push Jace back from the door.

"Hey! What's going on?!" Jace exclaimed as he nearly lost his balance.

Alec sighed before replying. "Iz invited her date from last night over and her date brought a friend with him."

Jace raised an eyebrow. "So?"

"His friend is a girl."

"Oh...how did Iz take that?"

"How do you think?" Alec snapped.

"Wait, why do we have to leave?" Jace asked suspiciously.

They were halfway down the path when he stopped to look at Alec.

"You know what Iz is like when she's mad. Do you really want to be around her?" Alec questioned.

"No, but I am curious about this dim-witted date of Izzy's." Jace replied as he walked back towards the institute.

He heard Alec run after him. "Wait! You really don't want to go near Iz at the moment!"

Jace reached the door, and being impolite, he opened the door himself. What- who he saw was not someone he thought he's ever meet again.

"Clary?"


End file.
